So two guys walk into a bar......

Ok, stop me if you’ve heard this one. So two guys from NISC walk into an Applebee’s wearing NISC shirts………

Yeah, there’s no joke there, but it sounded like one. The statement seems a little Passé I guess, although it usually ends up being the trick of the day. Usually when I go on the road I like to eat a places that are the local flavor – BBQ in Texas, Chowder in Vermont, etc. In Wisconsin though? Go to the store and buy a hunk of cheese maybe, but that’s about it. In the end there usually seems to be an Applebee’s within close approximation of your hotel and you know what you’re going to get there. It’s like the Gus Ferrotte of restaurants. Nothing flashy and it usually gets the job done, but on occasion will make you puke.

We’ve expended our options of places to eat not named McDonalds in the greater Menomonie area, so last night after work we decided to go vanilla and eat at Applebee’s.

I just have a few comments on these types of eating establishments, up to and including Ground Round, TGI Fridays and the like.

First off, you can have too much customer service. My soup was fine when my waitress asked 30 seconds ago, the manager doesn’t really need to come and check as well.

Please put something on the menu that doesn’t taste like cardboard for under 4000 calories. I don’t need to consume 2 times my daily allowance for everything in a half “Mandarin Chicken Teriyaki Lemon Pepper Basil Crunchy Salad”.

Also, when did it become the thing to throw up as many random pictures and objects as possible onto you walls? A picture of John Wayne, a catchers mask, a Nehi Grape sign and a Mickey Mouse doll. What do they have in common? Nothing, but it pulls your attention away from the crappy food.

I have a theory though, it’s the common link between every Applebee’s in America. It’s called my “Abbey Road Theory”: stating that you will find the album cover picture of the Beatles Abbey Road album in every one of them.

So what does this prove? Nothing. Other than the most common restaurant in America will always have the most cliché photo in America, in every one of them.

These are the things I like to think of over a nice Applebee’s Spinach and Artichoke dip.